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How to Win Friends and Influence People

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How to Win Friends and Influence People

Pocket Books,

15 min read
10 take-aways
Text available

What's inside?

The mother of all self-improvement books.

Editorial Rating



  • Innovative
  • Applicable


In the book that gave birth to the self-help genre, writer and lecturer Dale Carnegie spells out his plan for getting what you want from other people by changing your behavior. He expounds on the fundamentals of dealing with people and becoming a great leader. Carnegie developed these principles by drawing from examples of persuasive people in history, such as Abraham Lincoln, and from his own experiences. Since Carnegie wrote his book in 1935, many of his examples may seem obsolete or outmoded today, but his basic principles are timeless, eminently useable and presented in an easy-to-read and personal style. getAbstract recommends this classic to everyone – up to this date, no one has said it better than Carnegie.


“Fundamental Techniques in Handling People”

To master the art of winning friends and influencing people, first learn and practice the three basic principles of dealing with people. Constantly remind yourself of the importance of these tenets. Review them, and consider how to apply them to your life. Employ them whenever you can, and even ask a friend, your partner or a business associate to remind you when you violate one of these precepts. As you practice, you should review your progress and keep notes showing when you have used each of these methods.

Principle 1: Be Nice

The first and foremost basic principle of handling people is to be nice. To this end, you shouldn’t criticize, condemn, or complain about people. Instead of judging people or disparaging them, you should try to understand them and to figure out why they do what they do. This way, you can be supportive, show sympathy, and be tolerant and kind. People like others who treat them in this way. Individuals respond positively to such an approach.

You may need to exercise self-control to refrain from expressing your negative feelings about someone else, but do so. In fact, if you have the desire...

About the Author

Dale Carnegie was a well-known inspirational teacher and author who wrote a series of popular self-help books that sold millions of copies in the 1930s and 1940s. His books became the basis for a series of seminars and training programs and addressed the topics of self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking and interpersonal skills. How to Make Friends and Influence People was first published in 1936. It became an instant hit and remains hugely popular today. Carnegie’s other books include How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, How to Develop Self-Confidence and Influence People by Public Speaking, How to Enjoy Your Life and Your Job, and The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking. Dale Carnegie died on November 1, 1955.

Comment on this summary

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    R. D. 10 months ago
    Treat people likes how do you want to be treated.
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    J. T. 5 years ago
    showing empathy for others can be very effective in getting folks to follow your direction - in their shoes
  • Avatar
    X. K. 5 years ago
    The feeling of importance is significant in the relationship, which can be achieved by thinking in other's perspective.